Life questions

After watching the movie today, I started thinking... how could I not? I'm going to school to study and train for a business that has the highest percentage of unemployment over other normal businesses. I'm in reality. I know that competition out there is fierce and I don't expect to get a job right out of college. Heck, I don't expect to get a job period! I WANT to get a job. I would LOVE to get a job. I will NEED it like I've never needed anything before. But I don't expect it. Something that I've learned about myself, is that when I get rolling and really dig deep into working on something, that takes priority over everything else. I've gone months without social plans, without spending significant quality time with my family, without having "me" time... Now granted, I don't have to worry about paying rent every month and my parents provide me with food more than three times a day. But I do know that the typical things a teenager finds important: friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, shopping, partying - take a back seat for me when it comes to my dance classes, voice lessons, and auditions. I'm even going to spend senior cut day on the set of a short film, filming a scene as a dancer/extra. While the rest of my friends are at the beach or in the city, I'll be filming. And I'm okay with that. In fact, I'm really excited: I sent in my headshot and resume and they cast me because they liked my look. Now I know that's got nothing to do with talent and there's only so much control I have over my look, but I'm still proud of myself. But anyway, it makes me wonder how far I'd go to follow my dream. Money isn't something that I worry about. It's not something I find important. I'm not getting paid for this film - I do get a free meal but I'm doing it for the experience. When I get paid for something, I'm satisfied and proud of my work, but I wouldn't say that it makes me happy. When I get cast in something, that makes me happy. There's real no way of predicting what I would choose if I were forced to make the decision between persuing my career after 30 years of rejection or a real job, with a house, and a stable financial situation. I won't know that until I'm forced to make the decsion. But I do know that I'll go extremely far, and that I am willing to give up a hell of a lot. I don't want to ever wonder, "what if?" I wan't to know, even if the truth isn't what I'd hope it would be.